Proof of boredom. Find new entertainment

I've been going to the office gym every morning. D may be the foundation of that decision as it is impossible to start my day badly when watching his fine ass on a spin bike. God bless mirrored walls and treadmills that angle just so. He has begun offering a nod and a smile when he sees me, in and out of the gym.

Irony? The female population in the gym has steadily increased. We are all watching the same ass. Craptastic, no?

I am considering yoga. Perhaps a few well-placed stretches will serve my purpose. Mirrored walls can help, not hurt, in some cases. Although I've also considered bringing my eBook reader to the gym as a more natural means to strike up conversation. As a man, surely electronics will peak his interest even if Downward Dog does not.

My caution in approaching him can only mean one thing. Or two. Either I am really interested in D or I am enjoying the subtle chase of flirtation far more than the prospect of capturing the prize. Or three possibilities. I want it to be his idea.

Can it be all of those at once, I wonder?

Note to self: "Mia, it's time to distract yourself by messing with the boss again. Plan sticky note attack."

Being Venus

I wonder about the plot drivers of Angels and Demons. Secret societies in particular. One expert said, "The purpose of all secret societies is to rule the masses." Did he poll them? If they're secret, how do we know he speaks the truth? Wouldn't a secret society lose its secret status if it confessed to goals of world domination? And what if there were a secret society which wanted no more than to replace all margarine products with the real butter but didn't speak up as they were better secret keepers than the other secret societies?

Another curiosity. The Illuminati means, "The Enlightened Ones". Of course they were. If you lived in a time without electricity, wore long robes and hoods, moved about at night with candles, you too would light the wick, no? Perhaps they meant only to bear a flame so as not to trip on slippery unlit steps of ancient cathedrals.

Other shit: I still haven't located the popcorn culprit. I'd nearly forgotten but I got in to work yesterday and found several kernels beneath my chair. I know this because I ducked under my desk to pick up a dropped pen when D walked by. I've been able to avoid him successfully since my stint as Fountain Venus. Apparently my bravado in front of the coworkers was short lived. Or it may have had something to do with the coffee stain on the front of my blouse. Either way, I didn't think before I ducked. Pure instinct. Cunning and mature, no?

Luckily, my pen was found easily enough.

Note to self: "Mia, splatter more coffee on front and claim the blouse is a new Rorschach pattern in vogue for Summer."

I HAVE A LOVE AFFAIR WITH BLOCK QUOTES EVEN THOUGH I TRULY HATE THE SPACING ISSUES

I've begun Mind F*cked. Only six hundred words in and my internal editor has begun yapping. Meanwhile, I received an email from one of my publishers that edits will arrive in my inbox within minutes. Which is where I suddenly remember that, oh yes, I have a release out next Tuesday.

Technically, Sex Ed is part of the Hot for Teacher anthology along with stories by Bronwyn Green, Brynn Paulin, and Cara Hart, though they'll be sold separately. All release on the 19th and all get bound together for print publication in ninety days with a completely different cover. My recommendation, if you care to hear it, is to purchase the individual story you wish to read thus keeping your expense low. Preferably mine if you must choose. Ideally, all as they are well written jewels of creative effort.

The blurb looks something like this:

Mina Lasky has a pesky crush on Biology professor, Derek Link. They’ve worked in tandem in the same University facility long enough that even the sound of his voice makes her hot. It’s time to put the fantasy to an end. Mina signs up to be his guinea pig in a female sexuality lab for those on the doctorate track. She hopes to work Derek out of her system while enjoying some much needed sexual stimulation.

Dr. Derek Link has been itching to get his hands on the quiet, sexy Chemistry professor. He can’t believe his luck when she signs up to be his lab. But one night isn’t enough and Mina won’t admit they can have something a lot more long term.

And when one of the students recognizes Mina, her heart isn’t the only thing on the line. With her career in the hands of a blackmailer, and her heart begging to trust Derek, she’s beginning to think the lab was a very bad idea.

Other shit: I ran into D today. Well, not actually. It was more like I found myself sipping from a fountain (as I do when thirsty), swung around to return to my cube, saw D checking out my assets, and choked. Except choke would suggest the water in my mouth went down my throat with definitely did not occur. But I did discover two things: A pale silk necktie looks nearly cobalt when wet. And a second dimple comes out of hiding when D laughs. Which he did. A lot.

Note to self: "Mia, invest in water bottle."

I hereby declare that Love Bites is a goddess of brilliance. Do you see that
sexy spacing up there? Yeah, she did that. No more block quote issues.

Anal Ease. See Saundra's Link

Have this to share. Saundra gave Claimed by Darkness a 5/5 review, stating: "Like I said, this book really hit a spot I hadn't known I was looking for. 43 books later and this one is the only one in my current e-book library I think is just stellar from start to finish." Curious? You can find the book here.

Jasmine-Jade offers free downloads every Monday. Resplendence, every Friday.

Am debating whether or not to join Facebook. Currently only use Blogger and feel MySpace has had its season. Not interested in Twitter. Not possibly enough to interest followers, around the water cooler. Except perhaps finding D, stripping off shirt after intense workout in office fitness room. Indeed worth exploring further.

Other shit: Aunt sent kitchen towel in mail. No note. Only return address to designate sender. An odd woman but have come to expect such things. Wonder if there is hidden message in cross-stitched bread loaf pattern. Beneath, message reads: Winds Day. Am thinking Aunt had it in head to stitch Wednesday. As she herself is half a loaf short, can only presume she did not realize her goal and re-interpreted message in phonetic miscarriage.

Or Aunt is flatulent.

Note to self: "Mia, call Aunt. Insert the word hemorrhoid into conversation after each sentence. Deny if questioned."

Questionable Intell

No lurking Patterson outside my door. Expose did not net camera information. Patterson laying low. Cannot ask him directly. May have to concoct heater issue to justify discussion. Perhaps faux security concern would serve purposes more fully.

Special project at work has copious amount of information. Local personnel payment firm documents provide not only salaries of employees but social security numbers. Would think the information should be concealed, yes? Fortunately, I'm honest. Have shredded fully. Tomorrow new project work.

Other shit: I'm in absolute adoration of The Bloggess.

Note to self: "Mia, locate shredded supervisor information. Tape together and send in sealed envelope to teach higher-ups valuable lesson in maintaining private information. On a brighter note, now have something of import to discuss with D."

Un-a-mused

Muse has left me in the dust. Would fire the bitch if she actually existed. Perhaps is a man. Would explain the constant disappointment I have of the inadequacy of inspiration. Am considering a call in, due to illness. *Cough* See? Am horribly ill. *Cough, cough* But could get much writing finished.

Other shit: Bored with K/supervisor drama. Am also getting nowhere with D (studly manager). Would say I am losing my touch but I have yet to make real attempt. Still studying my prey. Oddly, my calm demeanor has slipped with this one. Should I be worried?

Other-er shit: R still behind dumpster smoking. In rain. Persistent bugger. Told him smoking is bad for his health. R said "Suck my hairy balls", to which I answered, "When you have some, love." Have no intention of actually doing so, mind you. I hate children.

Am now thinking my retort was not a wise statement as R need only report that I made an offer to a minor. Hopefully he is not clever enough to figure it and I will be wiser.

Note to self: "Mia, mind your tongue. It has caused trouble more than once. Begin re-employment of said appendage toward happier pursuits. Preferably involving chocolate."

Something in the water

Caught immediate supervisor (not sexy D, no, the toad who believes I am his secretary) at desk-side of another co-worker. Irony is that supervisor has spent much time seeking out K and K spends equal time avoiding him.

Mind, K is married with teen daughter. Supervisor is married as well. Given pics gracing his desk, would assume he has at least two adult children. Has become quite the office joke to see him lurking around cubicle dividers. Those near K do provide warning if able. Best I can tell, supervisor has monumental crush on her. Would be sweet if not utterly horrifying.

Further, Mailroom Joe has begun making special trips to K's part of the office. Am I to suspect she is suddenly emitting irresistible pheromones? Should bottle it for the single contingent. K is admittedly an attractive woman with controlling husband. Perhaps she obtained solace with young Joe and now he is smitten. If so, supervisor may have caught wind and hopes blackmail will suddenly make him appealing.

My wearing bottle-lens glasses, downing 12 tequila shots, and a deep body scour would not make him appealing to my mind. Man needs to wash his hair every month at minimum. Why is that hard?

Other shit: Accidentally caught teen neighbor R smoking behind dumpster. Upon discovery, sullen boy offered a drag and asked for beer.

Note to self: "Mia, remember to email electronic books to work. Appears will have much more free time as long as K continues to put-out. Send K thank you note."

Waffle bra

Welcome Realms of Love chatters. My pardon for the crazy-assed glass of Vista on Java rocks. They don't play well together Thunder noted. Tried several hours to access the chat prior, and was on the phone with Thunder (chat admin) trouble-shooting.
~T is very pleasant. Charming, really. Great voice.~

Thanx for showing. Those who were part of the chat, and clever readers of this blog, will know which words to place in the comment box for a chance at a free read. Am giving away one of each book to the winner.

Would encourage any with questions to post in comments as well. Am intrigued that some have indicated they have them for me. Very little I won't answer.

Other shit: Found new bra. Am delirious. Finally a perfect fit and no tattling revelations when I am chilled. Which calls to question nipple-less bras. Do any women wear these to the office? Pardon. My error. Rephrasing. Do any non-pole dancing, business women wear these to the office? Would imagine design rather visible through sheer work shirt.

Note to self: "Mia, buy waffle bra. Big snow and cold weather. Be sure to wear white silk shirt without coat. Observe assorted reactions. Favorable?"

Secondary note: "Mia, avoid D during waffle bra day. Entirely wrong impression to make."

Powerless Mia

Saw M and W-r hand-in-hand through parking lot of building. Neither made eye-contact. Is rather sweet, really, if a little elementary. Am hoping one or the other grows spine before both turn into sappy puddle of doe-eyed slobber. Two meek individuals dating can only lead to chaos. What would occur if debate rose over amount on dinner check? Would W-r push up glasses and blush? Would M drop eyes and wait for W-r to manage? Waiter could take advantage. I see no good from a long term development.

Will, in meantime, amuse myself with watching an adult couple behave like young children. Beginning love is sweetly innocent. Am curious to see what first argument would be like. Dare I hope they do so in the hall?

Power went down in office Friday. Had no access to computers as mainframe also off-line. Took handset off phone for calls to ring through to next desk. Was in no mood for belching anger of callers. Would have accepted the responsibility had it been my error. However, as I was not in mainframe workforce center, can only assume I was not the problem this time.

Other shit: 9pm EST today on www.RealmsOfLove.com, I will be the guest for an hour long live chat along with Dakota Rebel, Bronwyn Green, Brynn Paulin, and stop-in Claire Thompson. Free book give-aways and interview questions. If interested, you will need to sign on prior for access to chat room. Come lurk or ask. One hour. Should be fun.

Note to self: "Mia, when next the lights and system go, trek to D's office and over to tell scary stories over flashlight. Sappy appears to work for M and W-r, perhaps Mia should take a page from the same book. Once. Twice would be redundant and boring."

Aural Sex

Popcorn eater has been suspiciously absent. Interesting that lack of kernels corresponded to termination of several jobs due to lay-off. None were suspects.

Saw manager D outside office weight room before work. Rather, I stood outside weight room, looking through glass at delicious D jogging on treadmill. Fine legs. Fine, fine legs. A woman could lick legs like those, and enjoy it.

Other shit: Am joining in an anthology with three other authors: Bronwyn Green, Brynn Paulin, Dakota Rebel. As result, we recorded a podcast on Aural Sex. Have a listen.

More Other shit: Have new cover art. Lovely, no? Sex Ed will release from Resplendence Publishing on May 19th.

Note to self: "Mia, contact payroll immediately to begin $10 weight room deduction cost, then to MOA for new work-out clothes."

A Sunrise in my Hand

Supervisor D still illusive. Joe too easy a conquest. Will go stag as tonight L and N have arranged gathering at Hooters in Mall of America. Aside from insane deliciousness, enjoy speculating on number of women paying their way through school with stupid uniforms. Amusing to watch old men making ill-aimed grabs. Will progress to Minnesota Picnic for best fried cheese curds. EVER.

Will be forced to dance penance for indulgence. Am going with Sunrise Martini to wash away the week.

Win chance at free Book: Free download of Claimed by Darkness (m/m paranormal erotic romance). Entrants agree to respect copyright laws and maintain ownership of awarded copy without reproduction of any kind. Commenters between now and 11:59pm on March 3rd will be entered in Book drawing. Is your email address evident? If not, leave in comments for contact purposes.

Friday yet?

S called. Said he wanted to know if I needed him. Said no. I do not require another person to make life satisfactory. Am quite capable of sustaining self without involvement from S. He is persistent, however. I wonder at the ego required for one person to believe they are instrumental in changing course of another life. The bollocks required astounds.

Other shit: Supervisor popped corn. Slits to bags were not so impressive as had hoped. Only minor kernel escape-age. However, expression from soda and salt combination--priceless. Gave Styrofoam container with non-growing bean to prick two aisles over. Explained as he was full of shit, growth potential for bean improved at his hands.

Caught heel on escalator at lunch and landed ass up in lobby. Hands are completely scraped. The benefit, manager D noticed my distress. Downfall, manager D noticed my distress.

Note to self: "Mia, present scraped hands to D and request he kiss them better. Then haul off to local pub with L and N after work. Week ended and managed to best of Mia-bility."

Alopecia Areata-look it up

Business: Two short free-reads from me are available at Resplendence on Valentine's day. One m/m and one m/f. Senior editor has requested additional works with proposals submitted immediately. Am looking at possible 5 book contract.

Other shit: Am full of positive energy. World conquering, mind-altering energy. Confident it is a result of altering normal pattern of girl-area trimming. Was inspired by pearl thong link yesterday. With merely a few swipes, have become South American and am quite impressed with general appearance and baby-soft texture. Am tempted to pet self but is not nearly as interesting as sharing the experience.

Note to self: "Mia, there is power in the razor. Today D is mine."

Of Nipples and Pearls

Local Y has pole dancing class. Other bad exercise ideas: nipple yoga, penis scrying, belly dancing for anorexics, belly dancing for morbidly obese, fuck it, belly dancing for anyone not Shakira.

Am considering nipple piercing. May have to get stupid-drunk to achieve but suspect am a closet masochist. Will try decorative clamps first. Friend mentioned pearl thong. Sounded intriguing. Hm. Wonder if wearing pearl thong will cause clacking of beads to be heard coming from skirt. Must ask L.

Ah. Update. D's eyes are pale gray. Strange star burst at outer edge darkening to pale green. Made idiot of self by staring. May have mumbled "fuck me" in response to question. Would explain knit brow of confusion.

Note to self: "Mia, must remember not to wear pearl thong around neck. May give wrong impression, or rather, correct impression too early. Am still hopeful of catching D's eye by normal methods."

Healthy Mia

Business: One publisher gives discounts monthly to subscribers using purchase codes. This month is 20%. Interested? Newsletter@ResplendencePublishing.com with “subscribe” in the subject area. Same publisher is offering free reads on site beginning February 14th.

Other shit: Discovered excellent blog. www.blogofhilarity.com. Recommend searching video tab for Sony. Laughed my ass off.

New manager is D. Have not had occasion to engage in conversation. Did have access to coffee mug in break room. Considered dropping Rohypnol. Have no experience drugging sex gods and prefer vigorous men in bed to limp noodle. Am a health-conscious woman preferring thorough workout. The Y has no bed sport substitute as yet.

Note to self: "Mia, suggest to Y they invest in specialized trainers to meet needs of all sports enthusiasts. May need to direct to this site."