Wednesday, January 28, 2009

A word about buttons

Have a theory about belly buttons. Am thinking that individuals with exterior knots generally exhibit outgoing natures with a propensity toward stubbornness and selfishness. Dipped buttons are thinkers and given to soulful examination. Not sure what that makes me. Have an inward button hidden lower than edge of narrow dip. Am I both? Have heard theories on earlobes (attached vs unattached to jaw line) and have decided to make blanket rule for buttons until proved otherwise incorrect.

Other types of buttons explored yesterday. Found the courage to ask M about machine sitting. She blushed. Informed her of wonderful device. To which she answered, "Doesn't that only stimulate the clitoris?" Had to admit she was correct. Suppose machine sitting stimulates entire area. Will do research and find another device for M. Believe M is a closet nympho.

Note to self: "Mia, take recommended device and roll of quarters to laundry after midnight. Discover if M's method combined with discrete model does what I think it might."

addendum: "Don short satin nightie with matching navy demi-robe and thigh stockings in case discovered. Preferable to being found in standard t-shirt and panties nightwear."

7 comments:

J said...

Interesting. I am an "inny" for belly buttons and unattached as far as earlobes go.

Hitachi Magic Wand vs. Maytag, eh?

Odd, I would have taken you for more of a "roll of silver dollars" kind of girl. But, if quarters get the job done, that's good to know.

Last night I was trying to sleep and my wife was staying up late anticipating a snow day (she's a teacher). I heard the washing machine thumping away from an unbalanced load on the spin cycle, and I was wondering why she didn't balance it out. Now it's starting to make sense.

Insights into the feminine creature. Plots thicken.

wv: whous
Who, us?
House

Mia Watts said...

Certain Hitachi would more than adequately handle all. It is enormous. Terrifying if you consider where to put for best usage.

Comment on roll of quarters had not occurred to me in that light. Unexpected laughter appreciated. Generally, pay machines do not run without bribery.

Must introduce J's wife to M. Snag J while wife occupied and hide beneath invisible cloak for listening insights.

ps. Lobes away from jaw, born in the morning. Inny. Deep thinker with good perceptions. Could tell more if lint were removed.

which reminds: why is male button lint always blue?

J said...

My experience with the HMW is that it is best suited for external application to vibration-sensitive areas. The idea of internal usage is a wee bit frightening, agreed.

I am unaware of the time I was born. I should check my birth certificate (or have you already done that somehow?) I am tempted to think it was in the morning.

Male belly-button lint is always blue becasue men prefer blue clothing. Or, all clothing is actually blue, but we are hypnotized into thinking they are other colors. What hue is the lint from the lint trap in the dryer (assuming you didn't just dry a brand new set of burgundy bath towels or a new sweater)?

wv: nulani
Makes me think of something hawaiian

Mia Watts said...

Indeed I do. 8:34am to be precise. I know all. The internet is an extension of my power.

J must know device well, as is intimate enough to reduce to familiar abbreviations. Curious. Is wife aware?

Internal use may result in blindness. Try refinishing wood. Works wonders.

J said...

It is through ex-wife that I am well aware of device and capabilities though internal usage was never attempted.

Mia Watts said...

"through her"? An efficient little bugger indeed! Assume discovery per ex wife has no bearing on current wife. Unless also a participant. Recomment Hitachi attachments for the curious.

J said...

You inferred correctly. I have no experience with attachments, Hitachi or otherwise.