Saturday, January 24, 2009

M/F Excerpt: Sex Ed (R)

Two Excerpts for J. One m/f today, insight into a woman's psyche. One mildly m/m tomorrow-to show what was explained in comment, without putting him off.

Excerpt from Sex Ed (unedited from Anthology: Hot for Teacher, by Resplendence, TBD)
This work is under contract and copyrighted 2009. Any reproduction of this excerpt without written permission from the publisher and the author is subject to prosecution by the full extent of the law.

Setup: Dr. Link is a biology professor at university. Mina is a chemistry professor. Dr. Link runs a lab annually for those on a medical track regarding sexuality. In this instance, Mina is the concealed volunteer (face/identity concealed from class, not professor). The subject is the female organism and the body's physical response to sexual stimulation. Mina is tied to a lab table.

(Dr. Link talking)"Her body is aroused, slicking her labia and inner thighs. That is from the stimulation of her nipples alone.”
“Not exactly,” Mina said. The words came out before she could stop them.
“Explain,” he prompted, his voice dark, sexy.
Her body clenched in response. “It’s your voice and the people watching me splayed out for them, too.”
“Public exhibitionism excites you?” he asked.
“Almost as much as your voice,” she confessed.
“My voice excites you then?”
“It rumbles across my skin and settles between my legs.” Confession is good for the soul.
“The experiment is biased. We’ll have to stop,” he said.
“What? No, please don’t stop,” Mina cried.
“Class gather your things. You’re dismissed.”
Several minutes passed and the room was silent. Her bonds remained tight. Then finally, Dr. Link moved to her side. “I’d like to continue this experiment more privately. Do you have any objections?”
Mina shook her head. She could almost imagine the signature mischief lurking in the dark brown depths of his eyes and the blond hair falling over his brow. The picture of how she’d seen him every day did nothing to ease the pitch of arousal coursing through her.
“I need that out loud, for the record,” he prompted.
“No objection,” she answered.
“Good, I didn’t really want to share you with the class anyway. When you signed up though, there was no question I was going to accept your application over the others. Don’t think you’re getting off easy,” he laughed, “pardon the pun.”
“Will you take off the mask?”
“No,” he said darkly. “Suspense heightens arousal and I like having you where I do.”
She quirked a smile. There was something powerful in knowing he didn’t want to share her. Mina relaxed her hips, letting her legs fall completely open. It was the only control she had at her disposal and hearing his softly muttered oath for the arrogant submission pleased her.
“It’s fascinating the way the female body responds to touch.” He stroked his thumb over her nipple, then swished the nail over its puckered tip.
Mina gasped.
He dragged what felt like a feather down her sternum, the length of her belly to the open begging slit between her legs. She could feel her clit straining out to reach the ticklish tip even as her hips lifted off the table.
“Not yet, Mina. You aren’t ready yet.”
“I am.”
“No. We’re still in the experiment. I’m not arousing you, Mina. I’m arousing your body. You may want me, but we need to get your vagina achy and stinging before you’re allowed to come. Understood?”
If she’d been untied, it might have pissed her off to hear those words. But tied up, aroused, and listening to the thickness in his voice, she could sense the effect was mutual even if he wasn’t admitting it.


Miranda said...

more more!

J said...

I'm going to assume as an editor you're used to giving feedback, and you've said you admire honesty, so I'm working off those premises.

It's well written and engaging, particularly if the end-goal is BDSM-based arousal.

Excerpts are hard for me. For fantasy (particularly sexual fantasy) to fully work for me, it has to have some grounding in reality for my suspension of disbelief. If it feels real, like it could actually have happened to someone through some fantastic series of events, then I buy in, as long as each individual event/decision that someone encounters is believable (for that character, given his or her motivations).

So an excerpt like this is difficult to fully engage mentally because I have no sense of the scenario, and more particularly, I have no personal investment in Mina; not knowing who she is, where she came from, and under what circumstances was she willing to be tied down to a table spread-eagled in front of a group of medical students and have herself stimulated (not that it doesn't sound like a good time). Following the construct to the scenario (was she desperate for money, is she being coerced, etc.) is more important to me than the scenario itself, much like the flirtation and cat-and-mouse in dating can be more engaging for many people than the actual sex.

Keep in mind this is just "me" - my personal peccadilo in regards to fantasies, most specifically sexual fantasy. Even if there are werewolves or aliens, it has to have a plausible series of events that leads up to an implausible scenario. That's probably from having engaged in more than my fair share of fantasy fulfilment. It's like a combat veteran. When you've actually been in live-fire combat, you probably don't want to spend your free time playing first-person-shooter video games.

So, if I take my personal fantasy demands out of the picture, I like the themes of control and surrender that are being explored. I create mental imagery and fill in visual blanks in my head as I read and this was quite he adventure. I'd love to see more.

This is all a marketing ploy to get me to buy your books, isn't it?

Wild word: eneuct

Mia Watts said...

Miranda- Hello. Glad you stopped in. I'll post another tomorrow.

J- Innuit, Eunuch

Well said, J, and yes, I admire full honesty. Excerpts can't give the whole picture without revealing too much of the book. Publishers get cranky. There is a scenario behind her current, erm, position. One she questions her rational to as she is being "worked" on.

If it makes you feel better to say I am trying to secure your investment, then be my guest. However, we had discussed the female constructs of lust and love along with my reasoning for the m/m genre you will see tomorrow.

Yet honest is in order. This site is designed to promote familiarity with my product for the purpose of purchase and name recognition. If I entrap you, dear J, then so be it. I shall not apologize as you are a most delicious catch for my brain to muddle over. You have caught me in flattery. Shall I blush?

Ah! There is a weird word below. A first: rednerb
red nerd
wet willy (have no idea why)
red burp

J said...

By no means did I mean to imply that I felt you were being deceitful. I was attempting to be funny and as will happen, missed the mark, perhaps. I don't believe that you converse with people on this blog for the sole purpose of driving sales of your books; my observation is that you genuinely enjoy it.

I feel no more entrapped than Mina, who willingly volunteered to be strapped down naked for observation (oddly, much like I volunteered, in a quasi-anonymous way).

Also, do not feel you have to water anything down for my sake (as far as posting M/M content). I'm capable of giving feedback on the characters and writing without being affected by the content. Reading about men giving each other blowjobs is not going to give me a hard-on, but it's also not going to color my view of the writing. Good writing is good writing, and will shine through regardless of the subject matter.

So, to further expand my personal observations on the female psyche for the purposes of "bouncing ideas off of you" and anyone else who comes along, my perception is that most women like mystery, but oftentimes the reality doesn't quite meet up. Men and women both, in the course of dating, seem to be looking for signs of what they want, and can tend to fill in the blanks based on clues that they see about someone's behavior (more on this shortly).

I think women like to control men through flirting up to a point, but after a certain point want to be "taken", as long as it's voluntary (i.e. with their approval). I know many women who have rape fantasies but would be horrified to be raped for real. They want to be raped by someone they desire.

So, the idea of this dominant man who wants her so badly that he's willing to overpower her is a tremendous turn on, but the woman wants to have control over who that man is, and she does so to a certain degree through flirting. If he seems like the kind of guy who she wants to be taken by, she turns up the heat, letting him know it's okay.

The number of women I've known who are the epitome of the sterotypical male fantasy (the woman who will aggressively pursue and "rape" a man if she wants him) are incredibly few and far between. Most men will willingly "take" a woman as soon as they are positive that's what she wants. The key word being "positive" as that is a slippery slope.

The trouble arises in that women and men can never truly know one another. We all harbor hidden hopes and dreams of what our "ideal" mate is, sexually or otherwise, and upon meeting someone, even after sleeping with them for a long while, we have barely scratched the surface. Thus the reason that many marriages fail. People don't let out their inner demons for fear of rejection, and that's a valid fear. So we all dip our toe in the pool, and watch whomever we date do the same dipping, hoping for a glimpse of what we're looking for. We unravel the "real" us a millimeter at a time, pausing when we deem appropriate, for fear that the next millimeter might be our last.

But you can't judge the iceberg by the tip, to mix my metaphors.

Example: I once dated a woman. We'd become friends and things were becoming more romantic. One day we were at my apartment. I had just got back from work and went into the bedroom to change my clothes. I came out and she was dressed in very revealing black lingerie and high heels. She was, to put it colloquially, smoking (not cigarettes). I was aroused but also intrigued. I'm into roleplay and fantasies. Things heated up. Thinking I was playing along, I extrapolated her behavior and turned it (perceptionally) into what I wanted it to be. As amorous activities began to ensue, I began to talk dirty a little, dipping my toe in the pool so to speak. I called her a bad girl (or something to that effect), and said I bet she liked playing dress-up. The naughty nurse, the cheerleader, etc.

Like a force recon advance scout who just realized he stepped on a landmine, I saw her demeanor change and she said, "Um... no, not really." and things deflated a bit from there.

I'd seen a hint of what I was hoping for, and made my leap. Images of Wile E. Coyote plunging off a cliff, anvil in hand, are appropriate.

I was much, much more cautious about sexual exploration with this woman after that, and as it turned out, rightly so. She's a very straight arrow, so to speak, despite her willingness to take the lingerie leap.

My perception is that women who are viewed as promiscuous or "slutty" are the ones who quickly identify the tip of the iceberg for what is lurking beneath, and move on (sometimes wrongfully so). They're looking for something particular, and after sleeping with a guy, if they haven't seen it, they move on to the next one, while in all likelihood the man in question hasn't even begun to reveal his inner self and is proceeding cautiously.

Men are the same way, of course, they're just expected to behave that way (e.g. "all men are dogs").

Wacky Word: conae

Miranda said...

Oh goody. Thanks for visiting mine and saying all those nice things! Love yours have been following you from the first (all be it quietly!)

Miranda said...

or rather albeit. Duh

Mia Watts said...

Miranda- I remember you came through "the black box" yes? I posted your link immediately. I've been remiss about regular visits to any blog. Am happy you are patient.

J- Apologies are mine, I'm afraid. I caught the humor and attempted a teasing retort. Alas, it dropped as a brick.

The fantasy is one I share. The truth of rape is very different than the fantasy. I may be seen as twisted in this regard for I do happen to know the difference on an intimate level. Let's put that aside, shall we, and move on to the topic of discussion. The fantasy.

The fantasy is similar to that of a BDSM arrangement, is it not? In BDSM the sub has as much, if not more, power as the Dom. It is the sub's pleasure being fulfilled and the sub who possesses the safe word. The Dom has the appearance of power.

Likewise, in the fantasy you relayed, the female partner has determined the safety of her "dom" (male counterpart) and plays along. It is the success of wielding her power over him, sexual dominance that he cannot resist her, which makes the fantasy work. She overlays the impression of him as something of a mindless rutter, controlled by sexual stimulus, which she manipulates to her satisfaction. She is, then, insanely desirable to her partner. What woman would not want that? It is this reason a woman might choose an "average" man who expresses his desire freely over a body-builder who expects her desire to rule her actions. B-b has no thought to making her feel special.

I cannot speak for the male mind in the scenario, but I would suspect there is a possessive brutality appealing to the testosterone laden individual. He takes, he invades, he restrains, she cries out for him because of his mastery. I can see the draw there as well.

An aside for other lurkers: I do not condone rape. We are discussing role playing of consensual adults not deviance.

In your example the misunderstanding is sharply noted. Your understanding of cues were perceived one way, hers another. However, it does seem she tipped her toe in the pond of sensuality for the purpose of exploring her limits. She may not have been completely honest about her desires when confronted with yours. Your readiness may have splashed the pond to her ankle-more than she was prepared for at that time. I'd wager she thinks about the moment with curiosity and no little interest for the test to her boundaries.

For which I can only say: Well done, you. You explored the reality of your desires more boldly than she.

Fair play demands my own admission. If I had been she-and I say this as a woman with her own experimental curiosities, some less acceptable than others-having my mate so readily accept them would surprise me to no little degree. May even take me from the moment to ponder. Women do not compartmentalize behaviors. We examine the scope in its entirety. By this, I mean all events in the day, all thoughts, all sensations are jumbled into each experience. It is very difficult to separate a moment from another. Most men I have discussed this with concur that males reside in the moment, alone. That whatever has taken precedence remains so until derailed elsewhere.

Back to your experience and my confession of it, then. While I would welcome new excitement toward a sexual encounter, I would still be distracted. You (if I may presume) would be in the moment. The distraction could pull me out of that place and leap several moments ahead to where you might wish to take the encounter and what it means to my limitations and boundaries. If I am fearful of my sexuality and the committed direction you take, I could react as she had.

Being liberally minded, but also cautious with my person (as you might expect given my first revelation), I would continue with an eye toward safety. Mine. However having discussed this with a mate before hand, I am free to live in the moment and release caution.

My current interest is mild pain with pleasure and light bondage. Have yet to explore it. Should locate a partner to satisfy immediately. - A personal revelation.

J said...

I once read a definition of the word fetish that really struck home for me. The conventional definition is: "A form of sexual desire in which gratification depends to an abnormal degree on some object or item of clothing or part of the body."

But I think it extends beyond that. Most people view a fetish as an obsession, a fixation. So, I heard someone define it as: "Taking something you're afraid of, and turning it into something sexual" (presumably in an attempt to gain power over it).

Sometimes you hear things and they click. That clicked for me. I think people who are into BDSM have a fear of being without power and want to be in a submissive situation where they still hold the power. People who liked to be pissed on have the fear of being humiliated, so they embrace it sexually, in private, with someone they consent with, and it becomes a control for them. Would they want someone to walk up to them and piss on them in public? No, probably not (though I can't say from experience).

That feeling of taking control of your fear can become very powerful and very addictive, which leads to the obsessive part. It can eventually reach the point where the person is incapable of arousal without the fetish, or at least, the absence of the fetish can make intimate contact seem bland by comparison. That obsession can often take a person to a very dark place where they feel trapped by their feticism (I'm too lazy to look up the proper spelling of that).

As you can probably tell, I speak from experience (no, I'm not into golden showers or scatology or children or anything a normal person would deem dangerous). I no long engage in my fetish, because in some ways it destroyed my life (but as lives go, people tend to arise like a phoenix from the ashes). But the itch will always be there and it will always be a part of me, as any experience in life is, I suppose.

A revelation for a revelation.

Word up: skini

J said...

Woops, I typo'd. That last magic word was skinki not skini.

New word: coarbi

Mia Watts said...

skinki: Kinky
coarbi: cardboard

You have exited the realm of my experience. I have had occassion to be the object of another's fetish. My feet precisely. Though, he had a lure toward the color red beside pale skin and feet in particular. I wore red lipstick and polish, leather strapped sandals. Had no idea I fed the fetish until he confessed it. The unspoken description is that I am pale. It is a property of most Minnesotans, I fear.

As I think of your post, I am searching for a fear of my own and cannot adequately find one which meets the criteria. I loath spiders but could not see how to sexualize them. I have seen individuals use serpents for fulfillment, but I don't fear serpents.

While I can agree that I dislike being seen in public without a touch of makeup, I cannot say that rouge or lipstick appeal to me as sexual toys. My mind goes to having to use them afterward, or replacing them which is not a satisfying solution.

J, might I encourage you to send your blog link? I'm beginning to feel naked.

J said...

I sent it to you this afternoon, somewhat around 3:30 Eastern. Did you not receive it?

Very interesting magic word: witypeet

Witty peter

Mia Watts said...

witypeet: makes me think of peet moss.

You went to spam, dear J, but I found you. And anonymity may be damned as the email assigned you a name. I shan't disclose it just in case.

Went to your blog and discovered that should I wish to leave a comment, my name would appear. Am unable to sign anonymously.

To your email, I must now suspect your fetish revolves around power. You keep me dangling. How interesting.

my word: gisses

*how appropriate

Mia Watts said...

Oh J! You have given me Christmas. I am positively giddy as I read your blog. And did you know your name is in your profile? The same which your email announced? You have no need to fear the loss of interest as that individual is no more known to me than Janonymous.

Such topics to debate. Such a wealth of information to discuss. Romance, politics, religion and the like. Your discussion on flirtation appeals to me with obvious results as I ponder the nature of this exchange with you. Even if virtual, are you not flirting with me? Welcome flirtation, but flirtation all the same. What say you?

Mia Watts said...

J, just read your new blog post. You sound quite upset. Has someone trapped you in an argument or are you self-discovering?

J said...

That name is a nom de plume, but like all good ones it has some very close ties that someone who knows me might easily unravel. If I were to write a book, it would be under that name. But my real first name does indeed begin with J. Matthew is my confirmation name (a Catholic thing if you're not familiar), ergo my middle name.

I cannot say for certain whether I am flirting with you or not. If you feel like I am flirting with you, I probably am. My basic concept of flirting is engaging someone in sexual pursuit, in a subtle or coy manner. I am not pursuing you sexually, for one significant reason I will get to in a moment.

I am fairly confident you and I will never meet and engage in a romantic relationship, not because I think you're somehow unworthy, but for many other reasons. If I were older than 12 and you were younger than 80, we might have had a chance, but alas, such things were not meant to be.

It is this comfort zone that allows me to be honest. As I said before, I'm a pretty honest person, but I wouldn't profess my ideas on sex, politics, or anything else in the workplace, or even with my family. Some of my ideas would seem reprehensible to them, or at least disturbing, and for their sake, I refrain. I don't feel like I'm hiding anything or being false, I just choose not to discuss things with people who I know won't want to hear what I have to say.

Here, on the internet, people can choose to read or not to read. They can walk away and there are no repurcussions on friendships or workplaces or Thanksgiving dinner for the next twenty years.

So, back to flirtation. I suspect most of the people lurking and reading this would say I have been flirting with you. You're an intriguing woman. You're intelligent, funny, sexy, open-minded, and you're a writer. I cannot say whether you're attractive or age-appropriate, except by deduction.

That said, I am married, and my purpose here has not been to seduce you or become an internet cliche. I like what you have to say, and how you have to say it, and you are very open with insights into things I'd like to know more about. You seem like an incredibly interesting person. As I said, I like you. I believe we have some similar personality traits and viewpoints, but as I said in my post on early parts of relationships, we all tend to fill in things about people we don't know well with positive traits. The reality of day to day relationships if an entirely differnt thing. At the risk of sounding jaded, I've been around the internet since there was an internet, and I've seen, read, and heard enough to know that most internet romances end in failure, if not disaster, as most people are not like me, are not honest, and when people meet face to face it can be jarring. That said, I have some incredibly dear and beloved friends I've met on the internet, people I've been friends with for a decade or more.

If I've misled you, I apologize. I didn't mention being married any more than I mentioned my age (except in jest), or race, or height, or weight, because up until now it hasn't been relevant to the conversation.

I hope that doesn't change the nature of our budding relationship. I enjoy our exchanges and you make me think, both about what you have to say, and what I want to say in response. I once spent a great deal writing (about 10-12 hours a day for almost 10 years) but for the last 4-5 years haven't done any and I've found it's made me dull, like I've been looking at the world through a pair of glasses with a milky film on them, or like I've been sleepwalking for quite a while.

Something in your writing woke me up, and I'm starting to feel like my old self again, and starting to reconsider and contemplate things I'd laid to rest for a long while.

You inspired me to start the blog, but as I state a few times in the blog, it's not about communicating with people as much as it is about writing down ideas and thinking through things, and a blog seems a very good way of doing that and having a timetable that I can reflect back on.

You are more than welcome to engage me on any of the topics, I welcome your input, but I will reiterate that I'm not writing all that gibberish for anyone but me, with no motive to influence anyone, or convince anyone that my ideas are good or right. I just like to think, debate, learn, and hopefully grow.

Maybe I have been flirting more than I know, because I feel like the guy who tells the girl something he knows she doesn't want to hear, with the expectation that she's going to break up with him. Weird.

Magic word: insen

J said...

No, not upset, just passionate. It's a self-discovery argument I've been having with myself (and occasionally others) my whole life, and at times I need to vent.

Word World: vater
Darth Vader
Love in an elevator
Vater, bring me my soup

J said...

I apologize. I'm new to the blog thing, but fortunately I'm not new to software, so I found the place for comment settings, and made it so you can comment anonymously. If anything else looks out of whack, let me know.

Newbies. Sheesh.

Word of Weird: morstsms
More stoicism

Perhaps we should start a religion of people seeking higher truths from post verification words?

Mia Watts said...

insen: ensign, incense
vater: water, tater, va va voom
morstsms: Mortem, morte 'em

Flirtation does not require capitulation to any particular goal but rather the investment in pleasurable discourse given to mutual stimulation...of the mind in this case. Fear not, I shall not "break up with you"-pardon the pleased chortle from my end-as you delight me too much for me to part with. I'm a selfish thing and right now, J, you are my candy. I shall savor you slowly and see if there is a treat at your center, shall I?

Toward seduction I have no concerns. While most of my dearest friends were internet found, I have yet to discover an intimate means for computerized satisfaction. Hm. Perhaps they ought to invent a USB device. A worthy thought. I would expect the sex industry to have come up with that one already. How disappointing.

And alas, I am not capable of wrecking a marriage nor would I wish to. Let no (wo)man tear assunder...

I am flattered that my humble writings have inspired you to restart yours. I do find clarity by putting words on virtual paper. It allows me to explore a variety of topics with freedom. Another reason your presence here is appreciated. Likewise, you make me think. I can go through entire days without doing so but seeming to. Writing provides a forum for exploring some social questions I have. Today's post for example. Once it loads.

Thank you for allowing an anonymous post. I shall leave comments as a result. I would not want you to have unwanted bleed over from opinions there to here should you not wish it. Such a think might hinder your continued honesty-and that, sir, I have valued.

Inga furs