Wednesday, June 16, 2010

For Kris Norris, my Canadian goddess of awesomeness

and because, it's damn funny.

Okay, so I'm gonna start off with something less Kris appropriate, but still, my niece cracks me the f*ck up. She's reached that age where she "gets" adult humor. It's been pretty fun. This first thing has to do with Jeff Dunham. And if you don't know who he is, you are missing out seriously bad (Jefuhfuh Dunhahhhm dot commmmm---sing it with me, baby). Anyway, I decided to take her and her sister to a theme park a while ago (yes, I'm just getting around to this now, sue me) and it was sunny, hot weather.

On one of the rides, there was a long line that winds under a rock outcropping with water falling over it. She's standing with me, splashing water on her face then we move up. The guy right behind us has been elaborating on the safety of water dripping over light sources (which I totally understand) to his kid. He gets to the part where my niece had been playing in the water, which had dripped into a rock opening in the wall. The guy swishes his hand in there and says, "The air is a full four degrees cooler right here."

She looks at me, head cocked and does an eyeroll (the way only a young teen can) and says, "He knows because he's a walking thermometer.... On a steeeek."

OMG. Nearly peed myself!

Then, we went to this other ride. Her little sister had been eager to go and we got to the front of the line when the older one very casually says, "That water cooler is Canadian." I had a Whuh? moment and said, "How do you know?" She pointed to it and sent me a deadpanned look...

this is what I saw when I followed her finger:

If you don't get it, I'm not explaining. Ask Kris.


Bronwyn Green said...


I heart your nieces to pieces!!!

Amber Skyze said...

Gotta love her response! :)

Kris Norris said...

What don't you get, eh?

OMG, Mia. I love this. And if you still don't really get it, all I can say is... Bob and Doug Mackenzie. If you haven't ever listened to these brothers, then you haven't experienced Canadian humour. These guys are way funny. They have a Christmas song... the 12 days of Christmas... and let's just say... one the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me... a beer

Yup. They go on to add... a beer, in a tree, but it's f*cking hilarious.

Oh, and I sent you an email.. Let me know if you want any more of my wisdom, cause baby, I'm full of it (be nice, now)

oh, and for the record. We don't say 'eh' after every sentence... just the important ones, eh.

Julia Rachel Barrett said...

ROTFLMAO! I almost did a 'eh' Canadian post yesterday in honor of my Canadian relatives but I deleted it - too funny! Your nieces take after you!

Molly Daniels said...

'Take the great white north...take off...'

I LOVE Bob and Doug McKenzie!

And your niece is sooooo cool:)

s7anna said...

Lol...I'm still cracking up on that one...Wicked observations!

Molly Daniels said...

'Five Golden tokes...four pounds of bag bait (I think is the word??), three French Toast, Two (coming up blank) and a a tree!'

Sorry; that just came back to me...must go to YouTube and see if I can find it!

Molly Daniels said...'s 'Five Golden Touques. Four pounds of BACKBACON, three French Toast, Two Turtlenecks, and a a tree:)'

Thank you Lyrics site:)

Mia Watts said...

That's both precious and incredibly sad, Moll. LOL.

Molly Daniels said...

LOL...Did I mention my favorite Barenaked Ladies song is 'The Old Apartment'?

'Why did you paint the walls?
Why did you clean the floor?
Why did you plaster over
The hole I punched in the door?'

ErotRomReader (Janna) said...

ROFL! You can tell your nieces share DNA with you. :)

Rassles said...

The puppet guy? Oh, no, I do not like the puppet guy. The puppet guy makes me hate puppets, and I am a puppet proponent. Greg the Bunny is my favorite.

Still. Niece? Brilliant.

Chris said...

LOL at your nieces!