Thursday, May 20, 2010

DOH!

Remember yesterday when I commented that Rudis has a lot of body heat? Yeah, well, I let go with a super duper Freudian Fact.

What's that you might ask? Why, yes, I shall tell you. As we all know, a Freudian slip is when you say something that comes out completely wrong even though you meant something else. Like the time I was talking about money and contacts and meant to say, "I might as well eat a box of contacts" but instead said, "I might as well eat a box of condoms" to my father. *headslap* Dad is reserved so this didn't go over so well and clearly exposed the truth that his baby Mia is thinking about sex.

Again.

Well, I've decided that what happened to me was a Freudian Fact. It's what you are already thinking about someone and though you intend to say an entirely different thing, the fact of what you are actually thinking comes leaping out of your mouth and carries BOTH meanings, perfectly.

Back to Rudis, for whom I'm crushing hugely. Just ask Bron.

I went back the next day to get three more piercings. I'll post the pics tomorrow. Anyway, three more. It could be an excuse to see the lovely man but I do insist that it's also because I just reeeeeally wanted to have these next piercings.

Rudis, being his warm self, leaned over me to clean and prep my ear. Since it's on my left ear, my face is turned into his belly but not quite touching. Almost and yes, I thought about it. That's just how I roll.

I'm laying there as the man plays with my hair (okay, he's brushing it back from my ear, but I'm having a moment here) and dab, dab, dabbing it gently with alcohol. And being tongue-tied, I say to Rudis:

"You are so fucking hot!"

O. M. G! I'm having a sudden flash of horror. Bronwyn's jaw is ON. THE. FLOOR. and I think her eyes popped out of her head.

Rudis: Wh-at?

Mia: Warm. Your body temperature. You're just really warm (ohgodohgodohgod).

Rudis, smirking: Yeah, I get that a lot.

After a minute he added: I have high blood pressure.

Wanted. To. Die.

Maybe also because I'm thinking that really high blood pressure, especially in the morning, would be a lovely, lovely thing to take note of... if you follow me.

So what does my Bron do? She reminds me for the rest of the day that Rudis also does clitoral piercings and wouldn't it be nice if he meticulously dab, dab, dabbed the prep area for me with as much care as he did the pre and post piercing of my ear.

My blood pressure will never be the same.

18 comments:

Sandy Jay said...

OMG, Mia, you tell such wonderful stories! LOL

Amber Skyze said...

LMAO you're too funny.

Chris said...

Heh, won't you be surprised when Rudis shows up on your doorstep...

Molly Daniels said...

(picks self up off the floor)
ROFLMAO!!! Thank GOD I'd already had my coffee; there would be a huge mess all over my keyboard and/or floor...or I'd be having a serious choking fit right now!

Mia Watts said...

@ Sandy: Oh I sooo wish it were only a story. LOL. The fact is, I say really embarrassing stuff all the time. It's out of my mouth before I realize what happened. Makes for great stories later, but at the time??? Ohgod!

@ Amber: You know, if I put that in a book, my editor would tell me it's too obvious. Sigh.

@ Chris: OH PLEASE? :) Of course, I'd probably open the door, blink a couple of times and be like, "Come and see my special place" and totally mean both "my special place" and my home. LOL.

@ Molly: Is it bad that when you said huge mess all over my keyboard, I had a dirty diaper visual in my head? I think my brain is permanently gutter bait.

Cecile said...

All I can say is DAMN WOMAN!!!! You go girl! I think that is great for the slip.. this is book material right here... LOL!!!

Gas to get to said shop: $40 bucks
Piercing: $80 bucks
Slipping with the hot guy: Priceless

Honey you made my day.. the only thing better would have been:
A.) being able to see Bron's jaw hit the floor
B.) you "ohgoding" it
C.) being able to see this hot dude!

Have a great day honey!

Kenzie Michaels said...

YES! Do you have a picture of him? And how did you get dirty diaper from coffee spewing all over, had it been in my mouth in when I read this?

Picturing having his kids already??? LOL!

Cecile said...

hell besides my ears (with one hole each).... I am considering hopping in my damn car now and getting pierced from head to toe... just so this guys hand can be on me!!!

Mia Watts said...

@ Cecile: You'd be well-served, my friend. Bron and I were chatting later about the hair playing thing. He spends a lot of time brushing it away, tucking it, brushing it some more and it's kinda lulling. And since guys, in general, don't realize what a turn on it is to have our hair played with, it was probably our favorite part of the tattooing. *grin*

@ Moll: Can't send you a pic without his permission. As far as I know, he hasn't been to this site to see the story retelling. Bron did tell him it would be up but she's away today. I just popped a note off to him to let him know that there are three days of just Rudis experience stuff. Guess we'll see if he stops by...

Cecile said...

Okay leaving work right now damnit.....

You are right, I do not understand how men can miss something so simple as playing with our hair as a turn on for us. I mean.. what turns us on...makes us hotter for them.. and whats hotter for them... well.. leads to great things.... duh!

Kenzie Michaels said...

I had my first massage six years ago. I had a hard time relaxing with this strange man touching my bare back...but once he got to my neck and scalp, OMG....he could have asked me to turn over and I would have said 'take me; I'm yours!'

Julia Rachel Barrett said...

AAAAAAAAA! Can you hear me screaming with laughter?!? Is he married? In a committed relationship? Inquiring minds want to know....
If only I had been there!

Mia Watts said...

@ Julia: Seriously? If you'd been there, I'd have lost my sh*t. Between scooping Bron's chin off the floor and you off the ceiling, I'd have a hell of a time playing it cool. Which, clearly didn't happen anyway.

Besides, I think he's all taken and stuff and my guess is that this would kinda embarrass him.

I also think (and no, I'm not going to explain this) that Rudis is into kink. heh.

Danielle said...

Sweet mother of Jesus Mia! I had to quickly turn my head so that I wouldn't spit water all over my keyboard when I read this latest installment! Oh I like Rudis....he does sound super nice and hot at the same time.

I have 5 tattoos and have had 5 different artists, all of whom were nice and fun but I didn't have any experiences during tattooing like the ones you had getting your ears pierced....I'm so jealous! Thanks for sharing and making me laugh and smile today!

Mia Watts said...

@ Danielle: Please note. The author of this blog holds no responsibility for computers damaged, maimed, or destroyed during the reading or distribution of the enclosed articles. Should loss occur... oops.

:D

You know, at one point, Bron was standing behind me and I reached up over the back of the chair (and folks, it looks kinda like a gyno chair but without the stirrups). It was sheer nervousness for the pending carnage of ear puncturing, when I nearly said aloud, "Maybe he should just tie me down with rope."

Kinda wondering what he would have quipped in response, aren't you? It was after that I suspected he was kinky. It was dumb luck that I somehow got a grip on my lips (ummmm. MOUTH) to avoid saying that bit of horrific spewage as well.

LOL. Glad my pain amuses you, Danielle. ;)

Anny Cook said...

*Snort* I can soooo see this.

Bronwyn Green said...

Dab, dab, dab-dab-dab.

Honestly, Mia - that was the best time I've ever had while getting pierced.

That just sounds odd, doesn't it? But you make everything entertaining. :D

Kris Norris said...

Hey Bron stole my opening line.

I was just going to do a row of dabs...

anyway, you gotta love when the brain/mouth connection just works so beautifully... though your comeback and coverup... brilliant.

hugs