Tuesday, January 20, 2009


Odd competition at work place. Are to grow bean sprouts in Styrofoam cups. Not sure of purpose unless is to taunt us of giant riches not attainable, unless we are named Jack.

Found popcorn kernels underneath work space yesterday. Mystery. Must uncover popcorn eater and reason for snacking at my desk. Hm. Am assuming snacker has popcorn fetish and fantasies regarding outdated Caveman calendar.

Note to self: "Mia, discover if boss is closet perv. Is known to consume popcorn. Mystery may be simple indeed."


Anonymous said...

I will offer the secondary possibility that the snacker has a popcorn fetish and fantasies regarding women who keep outdated Caveman calendars in their work area, and not necessarily the calendars themselves.

Disclaimer: This in no way is meant to imply that I would ever empathize with such a mentality, or can in any way relate. Merely a (admittedly male) theory.


Mia Watts said...

Valid addition to theory as I am undeniably both a keeper of outdated Caveman calendar and a woman.

Mia, consider pocket camera to catch perv, erm, perp.

Boss is aggitated. Back to work for Mia.

Anonymous said...

Is the camera for curiousity's sake, or some other punitive intent? I suspect there is no office policy against calendar-gazing and cubicle-wandering while eating popcorn.

Perhaps a crimial charge of loitering, or some sort of vigilante electrode-laden retribution?

Mia Watts said...

"Punitive, vigilante, retribution, criminal charge" Might the mia blog be harboring a criminologist? Fascinating.

Will review mini cam coverage to determine course of action as I reserve the right to over-speculate to suit my creative needs. Electrode-laden devices-my goosebumps are stacked upon each other in giddiness. Pardon. Is my twisted showing?

Anonymous said...

I'm a bit of a literalist with mental imagery. I had a very odd picture in my mind of goosebumps stacked upon each other, literally.

Your twisted is peeking out a bit, but not nearly as much as performing housework, naked, with the blinds open. I will give the benefit of the doubt (not that you asked for it) that you are not hyprocritical in your condemnation, and are not engaging in such activities.

Mia Watts said...

Whilst I do, indeed, vacuum, I prefer to do so clothed. Pull your mind from the gutter, J, I feel quite undressed for such visual liberty and hand me a robe.

My goosebumps and I are chagrined and blushing.

Anonymous said...

Fear not. As internet lore goes, you're probably an 80-year-old man writing out your fantasies in your dotage, and I'm probably a sexually repressed twelve-year-old and doing all this on a public library computer so my parents won't catch me with their Net Nanny software, so there's no harm done.

And no offense intended.

I think you should be more embarrassed to be publicly admitting to vacuuming.

Mia Watts said...


Bronwyn Green said...

Hmmmm...I can't help but wonder if J is secretly Mia's boss who's trying to lure her into a false sense of security...the plot thickens.

Mia Watts said...

Pocket cam will disclose all. Find the possibility intriguing, though find J's manner generally more intellegent than supervisor.

J? What have you to say?

J said...

I look around my office area and see no half-naked caveman calendars, and if I have perversions, they do not involve popcorn in any way. I believe you are safe in this regard.

And pocket cams do disclose all, as YouTube will verify.

Word #2 for today: bretste

Cindy Spencer Pape said...

J, we can GET you cavemen calendars.

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh, i thought the same = J is Mia's co-worker or something...

J, just turn around, because the calendar is there.... :P