Monday, November 9, 2009

things i didn't need to know

Craptasm of mega proportions with the business trip. Do you know what it's like to have to share a room (all right, not a room but there was a door separating our rooms so technically it's the same damn thing) with your boss? Your much older, farty boss who likes to hang his faded-assed boxers on his shower rod (NOT a euphemism) because the genius monkey forgot to pack clean underwear and now you know the man went at least two days commando?

I should have called his wife. Instead, I gouged my eyes out with the nasty toe nail clippings he left on his high-gloss dresser. WTF?!

You're probably wondering what I was doing in the man's bathroom. I swear, it wasn't anything illegal or naughty. Trust me, it sure as HELL wasn't naughty. Now if it had been the creamy deliciousness of my supervisor and not the boss-man faux manager type, I'd have had a sexy red nighty on. And in that fantasy, supervisor hotness would have been commando everyday and healthy but trim nails. HE would not have left his skid-mark ass prints hanging in the restroom when I HAD TO GO and the maid needed the room. I know we could have had our meeting elsewhere... and WOULD have if it had been planned instead of impromptu, "Mia, I'm an asstastic skid marking commando sporting toe-infected-with-some-unknown-fungus-of-sunshine-yellow-ew who can't remember where he put the BlahBlah Company files we need in zero point three seconds".

Instead, I am now completely sightless and suffering from PTSD featuring waking nightmares of boss-man's bid'ness sprouting mushroom head fungus to match his gnarly toes.

I'm just saying.

And because I love you all so much and have been unavoidably away, here is an extra day to comment and submit your names in for a the basket drawing... yes, even if you already did so earlier. I'm a giver.

7 comments:

s7anna said...

Oh my god! That sounds like the business trip from hell. Eeww...on all the gross details! I was already feeling nauseous but I now know that I'm going to have to go hurl.

Hopefully, you'll be able to recover soon...really soon...Please do yourself a favour and go treat yourself with a spa treatment for the inhumane treatment he subjected you to...Charge it to him as a necessary business expense b/c otherwise you'd have hurt him real bad! LOL

Count me in for your giveaway.

Thanks.

Happy Reading
Anna Shah Hoque
s7anna@yahoo.ca

Unknown said...

Wow - that's some nasty details! :) I'm sorry you had to suffer with such nastiness. Hopefully you'll be able to get the images out of your head soon.

Hey and welcome back!

Molly Daniels said...

Agreeing with Anna on this one. You certainly had the business trip from HELL!

Welcome back to blogger and hope all is well again in Mia-land....once you get your sight back, that is!

Mia Watts said...

Hi Anna, Amber, Molly!! Thanx for stopping by.

Wasn't that insane?! There were so many other things that just nasted me out in a way bad fashion. Once I can hold back the bile, I'll try to share more. Especially for Ms. Anna up there who is DYING for more graphic content. ;)

Andrea I said...

I would hate traveling with a boss like that. I hope future trips are better.

s7anna said...

LOL Mia

Shelly said...

Laughing my ass off! The trouble you get into. I thought I had it bad on a trip with 45 guys but this takes the cake, or toe nails, as the case may be. I miss you. I'll visit here often and leave little tidbits for ya. Kisses!
Shelly